Submissions for After Hours #5

Here are the talks that have been submitted so far for Ignite Phoenix After Hours #5 on November 20, 2015.

Submissions are still open if you have your own idea – submit your talk here!

2 guys one C cup
Presenter Any girl you don’t know
Biography I’m a stereotypical white girl (or perhaps when you’re over 40, you’re supposed to say woman?)… I got married, I got divorced and then I realized what men could *actually* do for me.
Description When a french vanilla girl gets kinky, she doesn’t really think too far outside the box. My wild fantasy to have a threesome with two dudes. I found the players and I might be too chicken to go through with it. Why is easier to be emotionally detached from sex… or am I just an asshole?
Why Anarchy
Presenter treelizard
Biography I’ve done some work within autonomous non-hierarchical communities and activist groups in multiple states for over a decade, and I’ve also tried to create systemic social change by signing petitions and writing letters to my congressman. I started reading about anarchism when I was 13 and studied it formally under a tutor from Oxford University.
Description All you need to do is look at history to see that hierarchical systems where power is concentrated in the hands of the few are oppressive. That’s because centralized power means that people must obtain dominion over others in order to have any power at all. But instead of concentrating power into a tiny minority, we can create autonomous non-hierarchical (yes, anarchist) communities right now to regain agency over our own lives and create a better world.
Jenny and Her Lady Jazz
Presenter Lady J
Biography My nickname for my vagina and my mojo is “Lady Jazz”. For the past few years she has not felt very jazzy! It was time to rediscover what made my horn section really blow. This is the story of my personal sexsploration from a dusty muffin to rediscover what really makes makes my “Lady Jazz” sing.
Description Often times men, and mostly women, go through life not really knowing what interests them or how to go about tapping into the space of finding out what turns them on. This was my roadmap for how anyone can tap into their jazziness. The world is a sexy place if you just say yes to yourself, put aside prudish fears, have fun and go explore those things that make you go hmmm!
I don’t cook or fuck. Why would you date me?
Presenter Lady T
Biography Freewheeling, self-assured, and self-contained, I was never one to believe in, subscribe to, or conform to double standards, and have a low tolerance level for hypocrisy. I learned my lessons the hard way, and was more than willing to pay whatever price was levied as long as I was free to do exactly as I pleased. So I did. The price was steep.
Description If asked, my mother might tell you that it all started the summer of 1976, the year I graduated from high school. That it began with the purchase of a one-piece orange swimsuit, a Hang-ten that fit like a glove. She could smell trouble at a hundred paces. That I spent that summer working in the emergency room of a local hospital didn’t ease her unrest. It was the summer all hell broke loose and set in motion an unconscious agenda that played itself out over twenty years, shaping who I am today.
How to Make Your Suicide Note Go Viral
Presenter Ian Murdock
Biography Ever notice how you can’t not click on articles about annoying Facebook habits? People are unnervingly passionate, as well as predictable with their social media habits. Where you see a tragic economy of self-loathing and narcissism, I see an opportunity to make a fortune for my surviving family in click revenue after I get away from your fuckers!
Description You’re in debt! Julian is never coming back! It’s not the “Why”, it’s the “How… are YOU going to achieve maximum profits from your untimely demise?” We’ll discuss tone, monetization, click flow maintenance (making sure fucking Buzzfeed doesn’t steal your pageviews), and other terms that drunk people will think are sophisticated. Featuring specific advice using existing technology (Posthumous op-eds using bots!) and diagrams of proper technique. Like the pavement, this would be painful to miss!
From bad to better… operating a dispensary
Presenter Staci Scholl
Biography My name is Staci and I am the grneral manager of a medical marijuana dispensary. I wanted to talk about working in a dispensary, and starting from the bottom, and rising to the top.
Description My story is about working my way from the bottom, and rising to operate a million dollar business… The canna-business. Fresh out of rehab for drug abuse, my journey of starting in the “growing” industry began. I’ve seen it all: marriages, fights, tears, laughter, and the occasional naked homeless man screaming at us in a schizophrenic break. My life went from dealing/selling drugs and living in a stolen U-haul, to working my way up in one of the best industries of all time.
Good girls don’t talk about bipolar
Presenter BadAss
Biography I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder at age 38. At the time I was (voluntarily) in a pysch ward for the first time. But that wasn’t the experience that changed my life. That moment came 5 years later when I realized much of what I had been told since then was bullshit. I’m a mental health and autism advocate, a mom, a writer, and aspiring badass.
Description Suicide, sex, drugs, deception…euphoria, clairvoyance, charisma: This is the yin and yang of bipolar disorder. I don’t buy it when people tell me bipolar is a blessing, or that it’s a curse. It’s neither. I will talk about the myths vs. my reality of BP. I have been told to stay medicated or lose my job, to accept disability and let others “take care” of me, to grow up and snap out of it. My short answer to all of them: Fuck You.
Why I Don’t Feel Bad Fucking Your Wife
Presenter Noah Dyer
Biography I’m sexually active, and often wonder why I and others are so passionate about getting our genitals rubbed.
Description I’ve had sex with quite a few married women. Maybe one of them was your wife!

Not only do I feel no remorse, I’m proud of it. Here are just some of the reasons:

1. You knew about it and were OK with it.
2. You aren’t giving it up.
3. You’re having affairs of your own.

And the list goes on. Pick me and you’ll find out more details about these and all the other reasons I would proudly wear the scarlet letter.

Girls Just Wanna Get Raped
Presenter Noah Dyer
Biography I’m sexually active, and often wonder why and others are so passionate about getting our genitals rubbed.
Description 10 years ago, if you told me that some women fantasize about being raped, I wouldn’t have believed you. But as I’ve matured and met more people who have shared their sexual appetites with me, I’ve found the fantasy of being raped to be quite common among women.

I’ll talk about my own fantasies of being raped as a teen, the appeal of rape fantasies, and how to fulfill them.

Clearly I’m not a very politically correct guy, but I promise not to make light of rape outside the fantasy world.

I Wear Hawaiian Shirts Everyday – Learn Why!
Presenter Todd VanDuzer
Biography I am the co-founder and CEO of Student-Tutor. I am 26 years old and driven by the need to help individuals face their fears and become who they want to be. I am about to leave on a 5-year trip around the world in a van to write, speak, and expand my company nationwide.

Learn more here: http://toddvanduzer.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/10/My-Story

Description I don’t know when it became the norm to want to blend it and NOT stand out.

Maybe it’s because when you stand out, you attract attention. And it will never be 100% good attention. There will always be some people who do everything they can to bring you down.

However, when you stand out shit happens. By standing out I hitchhike a ride with Ben Affleck, won a 1 month fully paid trip to China with a friend + $7,500, became a writer for Huffington Post, rock climbed 2000 foot cliffs, and more.

DMT: The Dream Molecule
Presenter Tgaps
Biography I’ve been a psychonaut for a number of years, exploring consciousness, feeling, and perception. DMT is one of the strongest psychedelics known to man and we make it in our brain. It can be journeyed with safely and properly or dangerously. I nearly died on a journey. I’d like to share my knowledge, experience, and lessons.
Description DMT, DiMethylTryptamine, an endogenous psychedelic product of the pineal gland said to connect people to God, the machine elves, the higher self, or just plain trippy fun. It is one of the main constituents of Ayahuasca.
It, along with other sacrements, recreationals, and drugs are to be respected.
I’ll teach you how and why.
Cinder – Where Online Dating Burns in Hell
Presenter Msss. Champion
Biography Msss. Champion has been a terrible dater since she first began, many moons ago. Online dating apps have made this adventure slightly more entertaining, but it hasn’t necessarily made it easier. If she has to poop, she’ll probably still tell you. Names are always changed to protect the guilty. A no kissing and telling rule protects the naughty.
Description Sometimes I ponder starting a side biz completely dedicated to helping men write their dating profiles and taking their photos for them. I want to say out loud, into a microphone, many of the things I say to myself while left swiping through Tinder. In the process, hopefully men can get some deeper insight into what women like and don’t like, maybe less men will so flippantly send photos of their penises to strangers, and the world will be a happier place. Maybe I’ll even get a date. Or not.
The Second Sentence. Life after Prison. Character
Presenter Frantz Beasley
Biography I am the co founder of AZ Common Ground which focuses on providing services for youth and adults attempting to establish their lives following their release from incarceration. I am a former criminal and after witnessing change in my life I wanted to assist others as well and help them in creating success for their own lives.
Description There is a system in place where a person is convicted of a crime which labels them for possibly the rest of their lives as a criminal. Part of my mission is to educate others away from discriminating against someone solely on the basis of a conviction, but to judge them based on the overall content of their character. By sharing some of my personal story and sharing the success of others who lead phenomenal lives today after their convictions I’m hoping to change mindsets.
BDSM & The Law
Presenter Don
Biography I am a kinky cross dressing attorney with more than 25 years of experience handling personal injury claims. I give presentations on BDSM & The Law all over the country, generally at fetish events like Sin in the City, Behind Closed Doors, Southwest Leather Conference and more. I’m direct, snarky and very experienced in both law and kink.
Description Have you ever spanked someone in a BDSM scene? Congratulations — you could be a felon. Come listen to a sexy seasoned veteran with more than 25 years of experience in the law and BDSM take you through the ways you can try to protect yourself so you can play kinky and safe. Better yet, I walk the walk – I’ll be wearing high heels and a miniskirt to really make you think about gender, masculinity and heteronormativity that dominates our society today. Check out my Fetlife handle under Dakra.
The Psychiatrist Will Choke You Now
Presenter M.J. Higby
Biography You either control your mind or you are controlled by it. There’s no better path towards learning control over your mind than Brazilian Jiu Jitsu. Known as the gentle art, Brazilian Jiu Jitsu teaches you to use leverage to apply arm locks, leg locks and chokes to defeat your opponent. It has taught me to control my fears in the worst of situations.
Description Overriding my emotions through the use of logic while in the worst of situations is an art that I’ve learned through Jiu Jitsu. By confronting your fears and insecurities repeatedly, their power over you diminishes. Through Jiu Jitsu, you learn to shed your ego to build your soul. My talk will inspire you to find yourselves through whatever practice or place it is that you see fit, no matter how weird or fucked up of a place that may be. My place of discovery has been while being choked out.
Remote intamacy: The other side of a sex cam
Presenter Bianca
Biography When I became a cam model, I had no idea the truths I’d uncover about this seemingly seedy underworld, but more importantly, the truths I’d realize about myself. I found the humanity in an otherwise anonymous world to be surprising and even comforting. I have a deeper understanding of men and of the dynamics of my relationships with them.
Description There is an incredible high that comes from witnessing a strange man reaching climax while sitting in rooms miles and worlds apart. Each orgasm is a personal victory. A feeling of pride and satisfaction washes over me, “Yeah, I did that. It’s mine.” As a cam model, I make the rules in my virtual room. I am the boss in control of myself and also in control of the tiny man on my computer monitor. I get off on getting men off, their pleasure becomes my own.
Weed: You don’t have to smoke it to cure what ails ya!
Presenter TheFabulousOne
Biography I’ve been working in the cannabis industry for about a year, and I’ve been a patient for a few. Most people don’t know you don’t have to smoke weed to get the benefits.
Description Many people want to try using cannabis for their health, but they “don’t want to smoke weed.” There are many ways to medicate without ever taking a puff.
Holy…Holes, Batman! Superheroes Are Sexy!
Presenter Russ Kazmierczak, Jr.
Biography I still like everything I liked when I was five years old. Comic books, cartoons, the Monkees, Little Debbie snack cakes…I’m very easy to please. The topic of superheroes has become strong passion lately, from their role in American history and media, to their subversive sexiness. I must’ve liked that as a kid, too…I just didn’t know it yet.
Description The leather. The chains. The masks. The codenames. No, I’m not describing a night at Encounters. This is superhero comics, and as they become more mainstream, their subversive sensuality can’t be denied. From Wonder Woman’s love of bondage, to the “Are they…?” question about Batman and Robin, were our heroes ALWAYS this kinky, or are we just projecting? My talk will make the audience remember their childhood in a VERY different way…and reading comics under the covers will never be the same.
Intimate Fun w/ a Strap-On
Presenter Mz. Pazzaz
Biography I am a massage therapist/ Tantric Coach. I see people who have many concerns about their sexuality and coach them into having more meaningful intimate lives. The main issues for aging men are trouble with maintaining erections and struggling with enlarging prostates. Women often become curious about possibilities…
Description Many people have concerns about their sexuality. Long-term marriages often loose that “zing.” Aging men are concerned about maintaining erections and enlarging prostates. Women often become more aware. Prostate massage can be a fun way to enhance stale intimate lives. My friend & I get a strap-on & explore the possibilities.
Truth to be untold – money, politics, or back gold?
Presenter Tom
Biography I did a previous Ignite Phoenix talk called Confessions of a Wounded Warrior. This is my objective view during my first deployment to the middle east.
Description I wrote a spoken word poem early in my first deployment to Iraq after a soldier in our unit was killed. My young impressionable mind needed an outlet and writing was one of the few things I could do then in solitude. I never fully agreed with why we invaded Iraq but I had a duty to serve my country.

I want people to walk away hearing the internal conflict of a young 23 year old soldier deployed to a combat zone for the first time.

Caring for Tulips: My Journey in Cunnilingus
Presenter Cat Gets Your Tongue
Biography Late 20s Phoenix native with a passion for cunnilingus. After honing my cunnilingus skills through 10 years of a committed relationship, I found out my (now ex-) wife was a lesbian. Figures. After getting a divorce, instead of burying my head in the sand, I decided to continue burying it in vagina.
Description So many people – especially men – are terrible at cunnilingus. It’s often a mix of bashfulness, ignorance, and arrogance. I hope to inspire those who haven’t yet found the courage to go down on their partner through informative teachings and entertaining anecdotes. One should walk away with an understanding of the basics, the curiosity to learn more, and a confident desire to explore their partner’s tulips (two lips).
The time I met a very disfigured Jesus Christ!
Presenter David Delgado
Biography I’m a local comedian an bartenderat the Bikini lounge famous for my insane stories an experiences!
Description I’m not saying this guy was Jesus but what he told me and what he did were amazing I told this story many times an its caused anger laughter and people just don’t what to think! And it’s true!
Beyond the Dick Pic: CAT (Cock Aptitude Test)
Presenter Professor Violette Z.
Biography After a long career in professional fields and education, I have witnessed the rising emphasis on measurement in a wide range of areas. As a single woman, however, I noticed that assessment tools were severely lacking in one of the most important areas of contemporary social life, & felt I should use my professional expertise to address this gap.
Description Our society has moved toward a comprehensive culture of measurement, even a Quantified Self movement for sharing detailed records of participants’ every physical, mental, and emotional state.

Meanwhile, the rise of dating apps & hook-up culture make sex readily available. Yet a frequent complaint by women is that quantity far exceeds quality. I propose a long overdue national assessment standard for men’s sexual aptitude, allowing more accurate evaluations than today’s crude dick pic method.

Cunnilingus: Not just for Shakespeare!
Presenter Will S.
Biography I’ve always found eating pussy fascinating. I’ve also heard countless tales from women who have had a horrible time when it comes to cunnilingus. I’m to help solve that problem.
Description Eating pussy is important, a civil duty of sorts; I want to inspire, from the new lickers to the veteran pussy eaters that cunnilingus is just as intimate and enjoyable as the act of sex itself. Through discussing the history, societal hang ups and stigma that surround cunnilingus, I want to change the mind of individuals who shy away from the idea of performing such a valuable and intimate act. I want you to walk away screaming “YES! I will eat some fucking pussy! And I’m going to LOVE IT!”
Mrs Sexy-Becoming a Hot Wife
Presenter Juliet Adelaide
Biography My husband and I are a devoted couple who only recently opened our marriage to new sexual experiences. mrs Sexy is my first book, and it takes the reader through all of my most personal moments of my adventures. It details my experiences of my hot wife transition and what has happened with my now open marriage.
Description I would like to share some information about my recent transition from being a devoted and loyal wife for 21 years to becoming a hot wife. A hot wife is permitted to have sex outside of marriage as long as the husband is fully told of all details and often involved in their threesomes. It’s a new lifestyle that is becoming more popular and has added new excitement to our sex life. I also wrote a book about it.
Love Hurts
Presenter Dr. E. Spengler
Biography As I board certified OB/GYN, I deal with coital emergencies on a weekly basis. While some are heartbreaking, most are the result of humans being human.
Description The incidence of coital emergencies – or sexy time antics that land you in the E.R.- has increased since the publication of “50 Shades of Grey”. I’ll discuss my most common cases and few that are the stuff of urban legends. I’ll also give tips on avoiding an awkward, middle-of the- night encounter with me in the E.R.; because, honestly, no one believes you just fell on it.
Death by Papercuts
Presenter Bethany Harden
Biography 350 characters!? Ahh you’re worse than Twitter! Anyway, I started this project 2 years ago on my blog as a “happy mail” project to send 1000 paper cranes across the world after reading the story of Sadako and the 1000 Paper Cranes. After sending several, I quickly realized it would become much more than just some mail project.
Description We all face bullshit in life but that doesn’t mean we have to be a bunch of assholes. There are people that need positivity & it takes very little effort from others to help. I want to encourage others to not be afraid to reach out, listen, & help give them a reason to smile. I’ve gained a lot from the people I’ve come in contact with because of this project. I’ve learned there are a lot of people suffering, & if I can listen or make them smile even just for a moment, I’m going to try to.
I have Tourette’s and it Fucking Sucks
Presenter Whiss
Biography I’m an improvisor with the Torch Theatre and I’ve had Tourette Syndrome since I was a kid. FUCK.
Description Having Tourette’s as a thirty one year old woman is extremely friggin frustrating. People joke about Tourette’s ALL. THE. TIME. I want people to understand that Tourette’s isn’t just the “cussing thing”. It’s a controlling asshole of a disorder that can rule your life!
Hidden Homeless
Presenter Justin
Biography I was a homeless teenager. Not that you would know just by looking at me. I was a highly religious young man, and I got into trouble with drugs and the law. I spent a year homeless on the streets in and around Philadelphia. I went to jail, and served my time. I worked hard to get out of that slump, now I do outreach and do my part to help others.
Description Given the opportunity, I would discuss how I got into my position of being homeless and how fast that happened and my struggles to work past that. I want to encourage others to see what they may not know is there, to know it is not hard to help. I want to educate on how easy it is to lose yourself with no support, and how to find the right people to help. I want people to know what life like that is really like and walk away feeling grateful and inspired to do more.
Learning to Accept (and Embrace!) My Inner Fangirl
Presenter Anabel Martini
Biography I’m a passionate gamer, artist, and a geek culture enthusiast. I nourish my inner fangirl with a healthy diet of comic/gaming convention, getting into passionate geek battles online over who could take down the Hulk, and working on awesome cosplay props with my husband.
Description I can’t think of any young women in my generation who didn’t survive their Tina Belcher phase without stumbling alongside their awkward inner fangirl. Fan fiction is more than women sharing fandom smut with other women. I want to explore the importance of erotic fan fiction in it’s scope as an empowering female-dominated hobby, especially as a safe way for young women to explore their sexuality (with personal anecdotes).
Overdoctored/Underwell – Empowering Sensible Care
Presenter Susan S. Wilder, MD
Biography As a Family Physician for close to 25 years, I am passionate about reviving common sense in health care. We are spending a fortune – more than any other developed nation – on healthcare (over17% of our GDP!) and achieving shamefully poor health outcomes, ranking 37th in life expectancy and 28th in healthy life expectancy among developed nations.
Description Responsibility for our health begins and ends with each one of us – we cannot afford to delegate it to schools, insurers, doctors, hospitals, employers or the government.
MORE is NOT necessarily better when it comes to your health.
Having an “-ologist” for every body part leads to more costly care, but is it better?
Is your doctor simply monitoring your deterioration or throwing a prescription at every symptom?
We’ll review empowering strategies to take charge of your health.
We shouldn’t be here
Presenter Carlos Alvarez
Biography I’m 50, an entrepreneur, libertarian, a total nut when it comes to social norms, and mildly on the autistic spectrum. Which means I often simply don’t understand people, society, and particularly “norms” that are based on judgements and prejudices. I’ve spent a lot of my life researching and learning how to simply ignore expectations and not judg
Description When I first heard about this event and the description “talk about things you can’t talk about in public,” my first thought was that we can talk about anything in public. There shouldn’t be judgements on what is “acceptable” or not. My talk will be about accepting things for just what they are, without judgement or evaluation. About letting people and things just be without assumptions and without necessarily an emotional reaction.
Puppetry For Adults
Presenter Stacey Gordon
Biography I’m a puppeteer who owns Puppet Pie–a puppetry studio in downtown Phoenix. I built my first puppet with my mom in high school for our church group. Jump forward 20 years when people often hear that I’m a puppeteer they immediately ask if I do birthday parties. I don’t. I only do puppet shows for adults.
Description Puppetry is an art form that’s often overlooked as being for adult audiences. I’ve done puppet shows for adults in Phoenix since 2002, and I’m still surprised by how many times I’m still asked, “do adults even watch puppet shows?” or, “do you have sex with your puppets?” (The answer is no to 1 of those questions.) But puppetry for adults doesn’t mean fleece penises flying through the air and having puppets say curse words all day. It can, but there’s a bigger world out there. And it’s amazing.
The best place to have public sex in Saudi Arabia
Presenter Veeds of Arabia
Biography I taught ESL in Saudi Arabia. Though fascinating in many respects, it is one of the most oppressive countries for a single person–literally no wine, no women and no song. I found ways to overcome all three limitations.
Description Strictly speaking , two single people are not even allowed to be seen in public together, be it a restaurant or cafe. I found what is perhaps the only safe haven in the kingdom outside of a private compound : the 10-square km grounds known as the “Embassy Quarter” — neither embassy nor city. With homemade wine, an iPod and a willing Saudi paramour, we overcame both legal and cultural restrictions.
From Nerd Life To Porn Life
Presenter Matt Micheletti
Biography I grew up a very awkward and shy kid. I cloistered myself away in my room for hours on end exploring the internet. I discovered pornography at an early age and became fascinated with the human body as well as self pleasure. As I became an adult I wanted to know more. Eventually, I sent a few emails & pics and found myself on a porn set.
Description I am passionate about self and body awareness, pertaining to socialization and the elimination of body shaming. The way we mold ourselves is important to how we act in society in regards to our own personal and sexual relationships. Both positive and negative outcomes can be shaped years ahead of time by positive enforcement of the self and by experiencing sexuality without shame. I was not a muscle-bound porn guy. I was not a stereotype. I was just an average joe exploring his own stigmas.

If you have your own idea, submit it now!